The Meaning behind Walls

A dear friend visited over this weekend past. And if anyone ever thought that slumber parties are reasons to vent about trivialities, I can attest to the simple truth that theres great and valuable growth in honouring what may seem like something worth overlooking (or too much 'work' to deal with). Or too time-consuming to engage with. An important observation that I have made is that some of the most independent individuals amongst us are guarded in the way we manage our relationships. We seem to feel the need to protect ourselves. And so then this hightlights the primary contradiction of what independence presupposes. Or does it? We painstakingly build walls, brick by chosen brick, layer by layer, until one day the sunlight struggles to get in. And then breathing becomes difficult. And we do this. We make these irrational choices to separate and engage in the dance of contradiction and fail to live authentically. And then we wonder about this pursuit of happiness, when we clearly fail to see it hovering right in front of us, we fail to acknowledge its divine presence inside of us, and we choose to not honour that this relationship with life is to be appreciated with conscious engagement and not the go-with-the-flow mentality of dead fish.

So then why do we do this? Why do we respond with defensiveness, live with bottled resentments created out of situations we dont always have control over, and then nurse wounds made of self-defeating guilt and regret? Is there a choice implied in the ability to respond to something said or done? And if so, why do we choose to struggle through it? Interesting that we inflict pain when joy is within our reach and waiting to be embraced. Perhaps its easier said. But then theres still that choice. We were not always critical, judgemental, brutal or filled with victim rhetoric. I look at my niece at the age of one, and she is filled with enthusiasm about life, as she most certainly should be! And I look around at the people, at times including myself, who have forgotten that zest and wonder for all things possible. Everyday magic. And the gratitude in knowing that divine inspiration is an eternal river. It just takes wanting to refill your cup at anytime.

And those walls need to go. Theres a fine line between caution and paranoia. Or pre-empting disaster based on whats behind. The future has the innocence of a child's smile. Taste it!