And then I drink more of her loveliness.
There's a varied peace in this...
I measure my life in milestones. Not timelines, but in connectivity with loved ones, proximity to them. Haji'ani Ma, my maternal grandmother, is my measure for all these things.
I have noted various stages along her life path. A strong and resolute woman, but also a fragile and lovely being. She brought up her two daughters after being widowed at the age of 39. And I was born before her 50th birthday; to her eldest daughter, her first grandchild.
The cream over her milk, as she likes to say of us grandchildren.
She will be 82 this week.
Holding her delicate body in my arms, feels like I'm hugging a dream.
I already know that a part of her is looking onward to higher places.
And a part of her remains here, with us. Counting our successes, sharing our smiles. A haze of the fantastical forever lingers. Reality beeps to the beat of our hearts. Mortality of the body overshadows immortality of spirit, being, a lifetime of dreams realised, hopes dashed, joys shared, loss made visible.
Instead of counting the days, I want to celebrate the precious moments. One at a time.